Last week I asked you to acknowledge the thoughts you are thinking that do not serve you anymore
Now, take right action in the direction of balancing your life
Acknowledgement of the thoughts that lead you to (often) unconscious behaviors that create less than desirable results in your life is your ticket to balance. Dr. Phil’s famous quote; “we can’t change what we don’t acknowledge” is a great reminder that acknowledging thoughts is a crucial first step to taking action towards balance in all aspects of your life
Which brings us to asking ourselves; “what actions (or non-actions) can I take to balance out old behaviors and tendencies?”
Actions or non-actions to balance?
First let’s understand that creating balance in your life can be just as much about getting more rest and recovery as it can be about getting more movement and activity. Slowing down is just as balancing as picking up the pace – depending on what needs balancing in you.
The key word here is balance
*As rest between sets is important to the building of our muscles during a strength training session, so is the recovery/rest days between these strength training workouts. In order to properly rebuild and repair the muscles we have just worked – rest is crucial and an important part of creating balance in our body through our workouts.
If you are a member of my on-line zoom classes, there are many classes available, it is crucial for your physical body to plan what classes you are going to do that week to honor this process.
Just because there are many classes available – doesn’t mean you SHOULD do them all
Even though the schedule of classes and availability of recordings has been planned to accommodate recovery times to a certain degree – our own awareness of how our body feels every day and during every workout or Yoga practice is crucial to our physical success.
Now, let’s take this awareness and balance of work/rest out of our workouts and place it into our awareness of balancing other areas of our life – particularity those areas of our life that feel out of balance
There are many forms of work and rest scenarios in life and our awareness to these is our pathway to success
The pathway to success is paved in knowing when you need to take action and when it is best to not take action.
Let’s explore these pathways of balance born in duality…
- Action – non-action
- Effort – effortless
- Movement – stillness
- Activity – rest
- Work – play
- Serious – fun
- Get up/speed up – slow down
- Positive – negative
The negative thoughts I asked you to acknowledge within yourself last week are the catalyst for the next step to any change you are seeking.
In what way?
We use the negative in order to create the balance we need. Just like we need contrast in order to acknowledge what it is that we really want. The negative feelings generated from the negative thoughts we are thinking are the messages we need to listen to in order to take the next step.
This is a slight shift from emotions we are experiencing – very close but I am referring to the sensations we feel that lead to or come from the emotions we are having. Both are generated from the thoughts and memories we are having and experiencing…
However…
Feeling into your body with an open mind at the moment that you are having a negative thought or emotion – is going to give you a lot of information. This is how we practice the connection of our body and mind. This is what Yoga is all about. Uniting the mind and the body for our awareness to bring balance and healing within
This means we need to tune into our body to find out whether we need more;
Movement-Activity-Work
or
Rest-Stillness-Play
The answer is in your attention to your body and your ability to listen and take action to balance it. This action requires the willingness and desire to create balance in your life.
To balance out the feeling that a negative thought and emotion has created in your experience you need to create the opposite pathway. Opposites balance negative feelings.
Let’s take a step back to about a month ago when I introduced the 4 A’s. The 4 core fundamental human needs that we all have from an Ayurvedic perspective. Ayurveda says these 4 needs are;
- Attention
- Acceptance
- Appreciation
- Affection
Look back to June 20th, 2022 Tap In and blog post for further explanation of these core fundamental needs
For the sake of today, we are going to revisit them in the context of creating balance in your life with awareness to what you are feeling.
When you experience a negative thought and emotion – go inward and feel the sensation of this experience in your body as you go through the 4A’s.
First we need to bring ATTENTION to what our body is feeling with words or phrases like; I am feeling…Heavy, sluggish, sad, anxious, overwhelmed, flighty, too much is going on, a loss of control, mistrust, depressed, procrastination, nervous, numb, caught up in my head, too much thought, worried, I can’t sit still…
Secondly we need to ACCEPT this feeling. Not judge it or try to fix it away – but give this feeling the gift of acceptance
Third we need to APPRECIATE this feeling for showing up for us. This feeling has something to tell us and if we appreciate it for showing up – we will be better able to listen to the message it has for us.
Fourth, we give this feeling what it needs – remember the opposite will balance it. This is how we utilize the need of AFFECTION. We consciously, compassionately and affectionately give our body the opposite with the pathways from above.
Confused?
Let’s break this down…
When we are experiencing these feelings, our body goes into fight/flight/freeze mode – which means both our body and mind are under stress.
FIGHT MODE: When we are experiencing “fight” we will most likely feel; overwhelmed, like we have too much going on and not enough time to get it done, we may feel like we are losing control or don’t trust anyone else with this task or job so we have to do it ourselves and the tension in our body would be equivalent to how we would feel in a fight (mental, emotional or physical fight)
BALANCE with the OPPOSITE; Even though the mind will “fight” us every step of the way (convincing us there is not enough time) the balance to this state is to; walk away, take a break, slow down, go play, go do a Yoga class, go for a mindful nature walk. This choice of less effort in a time when you are pushing and forcing can take as little as 10 minutes or as long as it takes to get the mental clarity needed to calm the fight mode. You know you have achieved this state and can return to the task at hand when you feel the tension in your body releasing and your breathing is long, slow and coming from the full diagram.
FLIGHT or FLEE MODE: When we are experiencing “flight” we will most likely feel; jittery, anxious, worried, nervous, too much thought and cannot get out of our head, we will feel like we need to “get out of here”, and even though the thought of being still and alone with our thoughts is terrifying to our mind (so our mind will try talking us out of this) However, to create balance…
BALANCE with the OPPOSITE we NEED stillness. Meditation (guided or silent), a Yin yoga or Yoga for relaxation class would help to bring elements of stillness and stability into the mind and body and if none of those options is available or not going to be enough to calm the mind – then cocooning yourself in a blanket (weighted would be very beneficial) and placing yourself in a dark room will be the best way to ground this flight energy.
FREEZE MODE: When we are experiencing “freeze” or being stuck we will most likely feel; heavy, tired, slow, sluggish, depressed and sad. The mind will be in the most stubborn state of procrastination and will NOT want to create this balance because the;
BALANCE with the OPPOSITE is movement and lots of it. A workout – any workout involving lots of movement. A vigorous walk. A run. Dance. Every ounce of your body and mind in freeze mode will procrastinate and this will require having a stronger will to create balance as you are up against your own stubborn mind of excuses and reasons to argue for your limitations. Once you get up though – and decide you are going to move anyway – which means you have overcome the biggest hurdle of your own closed mind – the freedom from these feelings will be released and you will wonder why it took you so long to move… until the next time you find yourself in this same state of freeze.
Every one of these stress modes is not easy to overcome and win the battle with your mind. Your ego-mind will convince you that you cannot, should not and therefore will not – do the opposite of what it wants.
When we are experiencing these negative feelings; doing the opposite of what our body wants is what it NEEDS to create balance
Awareness to these tendencies that we all have at one time or another is key to trumping the mind and creating the balance in our lives. The action pathway we take will make all the difference.
As difficult as this all sounds to do – when you practice this on a regular basis, it becomes easier and witnessing the balance that unfolds in your life, your health, your relationships and ultimately all areas of your life will be the reward.
This Week’s Intention Setting
This week practice taking action to balance your negative thoughts, emotions and feelings with the opposite pathway. Start with curiosity and baby steps and remember, this all takes awareness, acknowledgement, willingness and the 4A’s.
- Today, be curious.
- Be aware of your thoughts and acknowledge that shifting negative thoughts is in your control.
- Be aware of your emotions and recognize when you are experiencing a negative feeling. No matter how uncomfortable it is; choose to do the opposite of what you would habitually do. Notice if it creates some balance for you in that moment.
- Observe your mind and it’s tendency to talk you out of taking an opposite action to your habitual pattern of action.
- Know you have the power to choose a different action.
As always this is not an easy process so be gentle and compassionate with yourself.
If you are interested in any private coaching sessions; Contact Leslie at 780 722-3442 or email at leslie@wellnessdefined.ca Private Ayurveda sessions also available.